Truth Hurts by Janet Waters.

                      Truth Hurts by Janet Waters.

"Nellie would never again be a whole person, her grief and guilt would continue to plague her for her remaining days."

The story spans almost 90 years taking us from 1919, post first world war era with all its hardships and through the second world war to 2006 where we witness Nellie's birth (real name Ellen) when tragically her mother Jessie died leaving a brood of children to the eldest girl, Rose to bring up in a 3 bedroom terrace house seen as part of the wages for working down the pit. We begin in a mining village in South Wales. The story has a historical backdrop to it and there are touches of autobiography emerging, otherwise it is a romantic story about unrequited love and guilt.

We begin in the present, the year is 2006 and Nellie is 87. Her health has declined rapidly and her one and only dutiful daughter, Alison is making one of her regular visits to Fir Trees Residential Home, maintaining a patience and tolerance rarely seen. The reason will soon become apparent. Nellie has not being able to express any love for her daughter and as her health fails her she is full of apologies for being a neglectful and careless mother, trying to explain the reasons why to her daughter. "I don't know what I've done to deserve a daughter like you .I'm so unhappy. I know I haven't been a good mother to you." She asks Alison to forgive her: "Please don't think badly of me. I'm an old lady now, time is passing me by. I know I've done wrong and it's important you know everything before I move on to pastures new." Euphemistically speaking.

Alison has been living with her partner Graham for 16 years. He is an IT Operations Consultant and had been married before. He was caring and attentive towards Alison which compensated for an unloving mother. It upset Alison knowing that her mother seemed indifferent to Alison's happy life with Graham. " You'd think she's be pleased that her daughter was happy and had found someone to take care of her. Why does she always get such pleasure in hurting me?" Graham nicknamed Nellie TOB short for The Old Bat. Nellie had been cruel to Alison telling her the reason why she had her: "I only had a child so that there would be someone to look after me in my old age." It hurt Alison who had not felt the need to have children of her own. Now she was too old to have children so it was no longer an option for her.

Through story-telling devices where Nellie talks through her childhood and adulthood to Alison we glean her colourful past, shrouded in sadness and isolation. There were ten of them living at home. Freddie, one of the boys had died at the age of seven from tuberculosis. Emrys, the father worked at the colliery with two of the older boys. We also know that money was tight and Rose had to leave school in order to bring up the family and look after the home. Her main role was in trying to keep the family together.

Nellie was 4 when there was an explosion at the pit killing her father and brother Edwin as well as many others in the village. It was like the 1895 disaster. Arthur survived but was diagnosed with black lung disease. More insecurity befell Nellie when she was moved to a farm living with her uncle and aunt, helping with the cows and livestock before being pampered with an Aunt Tilly and Aunt Beatrice, two lesbian women. This didn't last long and she was soon returned to Penbryn farm. An episode of scarlet fever and Nellie was hospitalised for a number of weeks.
She soon left Wales and headed for London, joining her sister Joyce but that didn't last either so by 1939 she found herself returning to South Wales, joining the Land Army and then the NAAFI in Tripoli where she met the love of her life, Chad Munroe who was known as the biggest flirt on the camp, an American soldier. This period in time proved to be a happy one for Nellie, she was one of the crowd, enjoying the hilarity and banter. She made her singing and performing debut as one of The Mad Macaroons and soon became romantically associated with Chad, dreaming of a future life with him. It didn't work out though: "What a mess. I thought everything was too good to be true. I should have known better, good things don't happen to me."
By 1949 Nellie then returned to Berkshire, met Gerald and they married. He was second best to Chad. Chad held her heart.

Now in 2006, Nellie knows that time is running out and she must confess a secret, a shocking secret to her daughter that will devastate her. "Everything was going horribly wrong; her world was crashing around her." It's at this point that Alison realises just how much the truth hurts.
Worth a read.

REVIEW it by Carol Naylor.

Publisher: Create Space. ISBN: 978-1514-6422

 Copyright. Permission must be obtained from the author before this article review is reproduced.

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